March 25, 11:00 Moscow time

March 25, 11:00 Moscow time, keep you waiting, hah? I barely think that anyone after so long time, and so much lies, even gonna comment me. Just, so you know, I did touch it bot all this time, pretty much a lot. Usually at my free time I work at the bot, sometimes once, sometimes twice playing with friend per week. I worked on it so much time cuz everytime its almost got finished, I didn't like the final product, I erase it and recreate more than 5 time's already. What make it harder, is my demotivation, almost every profile I followed stopped to work, and half of them got banned, maybe you think that your bots doing almost nothing, just pair thousand of messages from others and then silence. But, no, your bots, whoever are you, give others motivation, maybe its just me, but I doubt about that. This is so much funny, and sad at the same time, when my grandma, grandad, mother died, I thought that its not going to touch me, I feeled sad for a week, drop some tears, but nothing more. I was same me, as if nothing ever happened. But the more I live, the more I start noticing changes in myself, as if something inside is... empty? The more deaths there were, the less I began to show emotions, pain, happiness, sadness, my mother was the last one to die, and at her funeral I stood with a stone face until the very end, while all my relatives were crying all the time, and only at the end, when I threw a handful of earth into the coffin and began to leave, I finally got tears on may face. When I went to college, I had a hard time making friends, and even now, more than 2 years have passed, and I still haven’t made any real friendships, at most I’ve found conversationalists with I can talk, I found no energy in my body, I experienced emotional burnout when I first entered university, and it lasted for almost half a year. I didn't want to do anything, play, exercise, or live, and I just lay on my bed and slept. I loved to play sports until I was 16, bragged to everyone that I could do 14 pull-ups, I got muscles in my arms, but after all these events, my muscles are completely refined, I have no fat, no muscles, and my bones are visible even without clenching my hand. All these problems, all these problems with emotions, did not start right away, not like with my father, not like with all the remaining relatives, but like a lump, a snowball that rolled down and became bigger and bigger every day. Appreciate what you have now, maybe it seems to you that your works do nothing, but no, they fill that void, that motivation that is missing in me and in other people, I love you all, and I'm glad that after all this time, after all my dirty lies, I can finally post a remake of my bot for you, I hope I can also give you the motivation that you gave me, I am very grateful to you all for this