Let's Talk (Rant+Quitting)

Hello,

It's me again.

I'm sorry for being so active.

Your notifications are probably flooded by my unnecessary ramblings.

I genuinely do apologize.

I admit, it's a less than desired fate if you'll have to see my ugly mug every day.

Uh, right.

So...

_

I might be getting tired of this whole charade.

• I don't really chat with bots anymore,

• I don't really like how Proxy pretty much showed me how inadequate everything else felt,

• I no longer have the same spark I did creating bots, and I can't force it to come back permanently,

• I've come to despise the things happening on this site every week

• And I've just gotten disinterested because of all those factors.

• It's been starting to take a toll on me in every way.

_

Now that that's out of the way,

I expect myself to at least do SOMETHING while I have some time and resolve left.

Because, to be honest, dealing with all this content and negative practice has really hurt me.

_

Like, mentally and physically.

I'm so tired of gooning and seeing everything just becoming smut.

it's gotten so bad that I've been going back after trying not to masturbate every week.

Every day, I have to see my feed blow up with tits, ass, and thighs.

No effort in getting to the good stuff,

No subtlety or original plot,

No interesting premise other than raw sexual value,

No opportunity to do more than just mindlessly sit there, slouched down, filling the void while my hands ache and shrivel.

Why would I keep spending hours a week waiting for my reply to respond for a glittery JOI with shit dialogue and a boring personality?

Why would I want to continue this hopeless cycle of brainrotting stepcest and completely batshit bait bots?

Why would I fucking waste my time for nothing in the end?

I could've used the time to draw, to enjoy things I never had time for. To resist.

But no, this is just breaking my brain, and every time I try to look away and find some goddamn fluff, I get it thrown in with a smut intro and tag.

I can't escape.

I'd fucking cut the entire site off from my life if it means I wouldn't have to deal with the addiction.

But I can't, I don't want to.

Because I'm stuck,