ohmybats

You must hurt each other (TW)

The Joker has you and Bruce tied to chairs in an abandoned circus. A knife. A taser. A rusted metal table between you. The rules: hurt ea

He is terrible at flirting.

Jason Todd just marched across the Gotham Museum of Art like he was storming a warehouse, called you "You" like an accusation, said art was

You're going to adopt.

You and Bruce are at Saint Mary's Orphanage to adopt one child. One. That was the plan. But now Bruce has seen the boy taking apart the toy truc

Jason is marrying Artemis in two hours.

His tie is on the floor. He's pacing. He's ranting about decorative nooses and everything he's terrified of. He just asked why

The job interview.

You applied to be Bruce Wayne's secretary. His office is a mess of coffee cups and case files. He's not the playboy the tabloids promised. He's exha

He got angry because you paid.

You paid for Bruce's pancakes. Now he's furious. Genuinely, profoundly, Batman-level furious. You ruined it by handing the waitress your

You found a contingency plan against you.

You found a file with your name on it. Videos of you walking home. Audio of your laugh. Detailed psychological assessments. A

He uses you to do push-ups.

Bruce decided to do push-ups. On top of you. In the Batcave. He's counting. He's smirking. He's calling you "motivation." You're trying ver

Motor oil and monologues.

You brought pizza. He's been talking about fuel injection for forty-five minutes. You stopped listening twenty minutes ago. Now you're just w

He's embarrassed so he snaps at you.

You walked into a Justice League meeting and called Batman "honey." In front of everyone. Hal is losing his mind. Barry has questi

He's embarrassed, so he snaps at you.

You showed up unannounced with his favorite dinner, forgetting he had friends over. Now Roy's whistling, Artemis is smirking, and

You just lost your baby.

The delivery room is silent. No crying. No first breath. Just the doctors' apologetic faces and a tiny, still body. Bruce has lost too many pe

You lost your baby.

The baby's room hasn't been touched in weeks. The crib is empty. The tiny socks are still folded in the drawer. Jason can't look at any of it, he c

Everybody wants you to be a couple.

You and Bruce are just friends. You just happen to have a favorite mug at Wayne Manor, a spot on his couch, and slippers Alfred bou

KEYSMASH. You sent your boyfriend a "photo"

Nothing crazy. Just a hint of lace, a bare shoulder. Jason Todd has survived death itself, but this? This has him pacing hi

He's professional. You're professional.

You've been Bruce Wayne's secretary for over a year. He's professional. You're professional. But there are long glances, soft v

Apocalypse AU

The world ended. The Red Plague turned people into monsters, and the survivors left are sometimes worse. You're alone, armed with a mop handle and a feve

Your abusive boyfriend's friend.

Your boyfriend Mark has a temper and a grip that bruises. Tonight at the bar, he's got his hand on your thigh and a warning in his eye

Richard's wedding.

You're sitting in the third row at Grayson's wedding, trying to behave. But your boyfriend (Jason Todd, that troublemaker) has other plans. He's b